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Posts Tagged ‘meditation’

triangle flower mandalaI am not a triangle fan. They’re too pointy and pokey for my liking. I, however, did not decide on the starting shape for this mandala. I let my daughter choose and she picked a triangle. I suppose it didn’t turn out too badly considering. I daresay I could have done a better job of evening it out as well so the middle is less disjointed feeling to me and yet it is what it is.

That middle cluster of triangles is like the muddle in my mind most days, having it’s effect on the outer whole of the flower around it. It has a certain amount of beauty to it, however, and if you look close enough even the muddle is it’s own form of organised chaos.

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flower doodle 2Another ink doodle created in sessions over the course of a few days. It began as a small, five petalled flower as pictured on my instagram feed and grew outwards into this design. I can’t help but feel it would have been better without the black leaf addition towards to bottom of the drawing so why did I include that?

I like to think that these meditational doodles are more about insight than actually producing a ‘finished’ piece, at least they are for me and I think the fact that this dark leaf showed up says a lot about where I have been mentally and emotionally lately. Since doing this drawing the dark leaf has been growing. It is most definitely time for it to be pruned.

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I am still doodling. For the most part my ink drawings are done out of the house when I am in town with my notebook and ink pen. I am finding it to be a wonderful way to relax and get grounded, particularly in the mornings and evenings if I feel like I am in a bit of a muddle mentally.

This one is a page in my Midori Traveller’s Notebook. It began as a single flower and then morphed into a longer, full page design in black ink:

flower doodle

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Zendoodle (2) ~ ink on paper.

Design now available in my RedBubble store in the ZenDoodles category.

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Zendoodle (2) ~ ink on paper.

Design now available in my RedBubble store in the ZenDoodles category.

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Zendoodle (1) ~ ink on paper.

Design now available in my RedBubble store in the ZenDoodles category.

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My weekly card readings have become a huge part of my practice and healing, something that I have begun to both look forward to and cherish before I go to bed on a Sunday. There was a time when I used to worry about reading my cards, for fear that they will tell me something I don’t want to hear. It wouldn’t be the first time but when they do tell me less than pleasant things it is always for my own good in the long run. No-one likes facing the fact that they have to look deeper at themselves, their issues and their own downfalls and that they need to make changes in order to grow.

My cards this week were both comforting and a call to action. I’ve known for a while that I’m carrying a lot of fear around with me. In fact I don’t think I’ve ever been so scared of moving forward in my whole life as I am about this move. The longer I go unable to find somewhere to move to that will suit us the more fearful I have become. The first card in my reading reminded me of this, how my fear still exists at the root and that it is the block that’s stopping my progress in all aspects of my life.

I’m a worrier at heart, I’ve never been particularly good at dealing with stress and anxiety which is, by nature, rooted in fear. I’m not talking about pushing it to one side or distracting myself from my fear for a while, I’m talking about finding the root cause of my fear and dealing with it as it crops up and grows; bravely facing my fear head on deep down where it exists inside of me.

So I was sitting at my desk today stewing, wondering just how I’m supposed to do that and asking for guidance when a meditative exercise came to mind, just begging to be written down and I’d like to share it with everyone so that, if you are dealing with similar issues, you can try it for yourself to see if it will help.

Face Your Fear Meditation:

See your life stretch before you as a road that you are travelling down. It runs both in front and behind through different locations that represent different points in your life. At times the path forks but always runs in the same direction. What is around you as you walk the path right now? How do you feel about your current location? Ahead on the path you see something blocking the way. It could be an object, person, creature, wall or obstacle for example. What is it and how do you feel about it’s presence? Ask it why it’s here and listen to it’s response whether it be vocal or more of a feeling. Whatever you sense from it is valid. When you are ready concentrate on your heart chakra, feel it filling with light, love and acceptance of this representation of your fear. Say whatever you need to say to it and something along the lines of “thank you for the lesson you have brought me. Go in peace and love as I need you not.” Embrace the person/conquer the obstacle/see it diminish and disappear in front of you, whatever feels right to you and move past it, continuing along your path without looking back.

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